The Illusion of Perfection

Summer is around the corner, and women (and men) are gearing up for the dreaded swim suit season. Every form of media bombards us with advertisements, tips, and tricks to help us get the “bikini season body” we’re pressured to dream of. While there is no problem with a person wanting to get healthier and eat better, even for the sake of wanting to improve his/her appearance, my problem lies in the importance we place on our looks based on OTHER PEOPLE’S ideals and the illusion of perfection. That’s right, the illusion of perfection.

What does the word perfect mean? By definition, it is something that is without fault or defect. However, when judging strictly on someone’s appearance, perfection is entirely up to perception. What one person finds perfect, another may disagree with. Ergo, the premise that one can have a truly perfect appearance is simply a fantasy. There are billions of people on this earth, there is no way one person can please every single one of them. So why not focus on what YOU find attractive. You can appreciate someone’s appearance, but that does not mean you should try to conform to that ideal if it is not something you want for yourself. It certainly does not mean that you should try to change yourself based on what other people find attractive. I can hear the internal argument now, “But what if the majority of people says certain qualities are more attractive?” I would like to offer the rebuttal of, “Who cares?” Yes, everyone is entitled to his/ her own opinion, but does that mean you want to change yourself based on the opinions of someone else? Do you base your self-worth on other people’s opinions? Or do you want to decide for yourself what you find attractive? You wouldn’t let some random person pick your clothes for you in the morning, so why let random people decide what is attractive for your body? If you are constantly changing yourself or wishing you could change based on the ever varying opinions of other people, you will never be satisfied, for as I said, you can’t please everyone.

This is an issue we as a society have to fix. While the media does throw out these ideals for the most part, we feed into it, we perpetuate it. We tear each other down based on appearance when we have a difference of opinion. We beat ourselves up over having “flaws”. We compare ourselves to people that don’t really look as perfect as magazines show them to be. We have a society that says, “You can get plastic surgery,” which implies that our uniqueness is something to be fixed by paying thousands of dollars to someone that  is essentially preying on insecurities for profit. (Reconstructive surgery is a different subject.) We have fashion magazines that have an obligatory article telling us we should love our bodies the way they are on one page while pandering the newest fad diet, exercise routine, and clothing to make one look 10 pounds lighter on the next 10 pages, with all models looking practically identical. Not that there is anything wrong with being healthy or skinny, but the way it is set up sends the wrong message when that is all you see. Fashion magazines are supposed to be about style, not weight. We suffer unnecessarily in many areas of our lives based on how the world sees us. Is it nice to feel attractive in other people’s eyes? Yes. But it is more important that one feels attractive no matter what other people think, otherwise one person could ruin someone’s day. Other people have a right to their opinion, but each person has a right to his/her opinions of him/her self as well. It is also important that someone’s worth isn’t based on appearance, because it is true, looks are only skin deep.

So this year when it is time to hit the beach, don’t let the opinions of others deter you from throwing on your bikini (or swim trunks, guys). Don’t feel like you have to diet, cover up, tone up, or gain muscle or curves just for the “sake of the eyes of others.” Even if you are working to reach the body that you want, don’t let that deter you in the meantime. Stop stressing. Love yourself. There’s only one you. At the end of the day, the only person’s opinion that matters about your body is yours.

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11 thoughts on “The Illusion of Perfection

  1. I loudly applaud you my dear, could NOT have put it any better myself when you say, “Fashion magazines are supposed to be about style, not weight.” It’s about damn time that these fear mongering “fashionistas” cease to pray on people who have insecurities brought on by corporate, almost brainwashing, imgary to make an extra dollar.

    Exceedingly well done!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you my love! I have no problem with style and fashion, quite the contrary! I think it is the way we express ourselves. The problem becomes when we are told that THIS is beautiful but THAT isn’t. How about they let us decide for ourselves? What is so wrong with having models of many sizes and shapes, showing many different styles? Not a thing. They turn it into something perverse, and it hurts SO many people to be basically told “This is the ideal, live up to it or be berated.” Even if someone has a difference of opinion, they should not belittle people to “fit their standards”.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. So this year when it is time to hit the beach, don’t let the opinions of others deter you from throwing on your bikini (or swim trunks, guys). Don’t feel like you have to diet, cover up, tone up, or gain muscle or curves just for the “sake of the eyes of others.” —————— Soooooo awesome

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I’m at the beach all week with my family. The beach is one of my favorite places on Earth. I’m a fair-skinned redhead and only recently have embraced my unique beauty. I’m surrounded by tanned beauties. I realize l will never be that. And that’s ok. The most beautiful people in the world are those that know they are fearfully and wonderfully made and love themselves just the way they are.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Exactly! Everyone is different. For instance I have skin that tans really well in the sun (I LOATHE tanning beds, too claustrophobic) but when I was younger I badly wanted to have pale skin, but my skin tone just does not look right even if I don’t tan. So, I learned to embrace it. I embraced everything through the years, my shape, my eyes (which I used to hate), even my scars. Some people nitpick and judge others, but they are usually the ones with the problem. The way I see it, if someone had a problem with my appearance, it’s just that, THEIR problem. Confidence and beauty through actions, that is what matters.

      Liked by 1 person

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